Freelance life for sale or hire!

Without much of a doubt, a long time has passed since my fingers caressed the keys to create any update here, or anywhere else on the net. I've had my reasons, time management issues, connectivity disruptions, newsworthy disturbance, mood status imbalance all play there part so one should not subscribe all the blame to one individual aspect or excuse! It's done, it's gone and now I'm back, so sorry, apologies and all that, but hey the future is at my fingertips once again, so come with me and enjoy the ride.

So what has been happening in the world since we last shared the same atom of web space and time? Well, the world of book publication is set to change with the introduction of the eBook, an electronic version of the old trusty paperback, it looks sleek in the designs I've seen on the net and I want one, if only purely for the pose and novelty factors. Kosovo has claimed Independence. A batlike spy plane crashed in Guam. Northern Rock has been taken over by the state. Earth number two is waiting to be born and is currently in deep freeze, Titan the moon of Saturn looks likely to be then next place in our solar system for new life to emerge according to scientists, it's going to take time, so I'm not booking my flight there just yet. Solitary great white sharks are no believed to have the equivalent of an annual coffee morning, deep under the sea in their thousands. Researchers for the AAAS have found that these wonderful creatures of the deep congregate in vast numbers, at least once a year. The 'white' black man Barack Obama seems to be beating Clinton in the US primary elections in a system that I do not understand, no matter how many times it's explained to me. The new Bedouin are taking over, but this is not a tribe in some far reaches of Africa, nope this is the new breed of nomadic persons who have a temporary office in pretty much any Starbucks or coffee shop in the world, thanks to light laptops and WiFi and the constant stream of lattes and muffins. Longtime favorite of long bored afternoon's and family arguments, Monopoly - the game, is set to become a new Ridley Scott film. Castro has decided to slip out of control of Cuba, which could spoil the island forever. Just think, an end to the communist regime there would open up the land of rum and cigars to all those American tourists - how ghastly! Keegan's in charge of Newcastle, I wonder how long that will last for, a year at the most is my best guess. Peter Schiff's face has finally be revealed more than 60 years after the school boy captivated the heart of teenage diarist Anne Frank, and yes he looks cute, if perhaps a little gay! A punter that placed a 50p on 8 horses, the first of which was called 'Isn't That Lucky' and the last named 'A Dream Come True' beat the odds of two million to one to scoop the first betting shop million pound pay out, well not quite, he still hasn't picked up his winnings! After research costing more than 500 grand, it's been revealed that young women between the ages of 16 and 24 drink far too much - no shit Sherlock, a look around any big town on a Saturday night could have told you that for the price of a bus fare! A Turkey is going to represent Ireland at the Eurovision song contest. Apparently depression makes you stronger - funny I should feel like a gladiator right now then! Richard Dearlove has told the Diana inquest that in over 38 years he's never seen a licence to kill granted at MI6, what a disappointment. American kids may be going to school for longer and longer periods of time, yet they still learn very little, which is why less that 23% could tell you where in the World you'd find Iran, Iraq, Saudi Arabia or Israel! And, I guess that brings us nicely to the end of my world news update, which I'm sure has entertained you so much that, if you've actually read this far, you're just a sparrow's step away from a comatose vegative state!

Now then, what's been happening in the smaller boundaries and rather less intimidating sphere of this planet that is my world? Well, Jakey has been round several times and has not had much to shout about. He and his student house mate have called a halt to their rampant bedroom antics, mainly because one of their other house mates caught them at it over the kitchen table and the poor girl freaked at the sight! So, they have decided that they should stop getting jiggy with it in the house and really the only thing that had in common was being young, dumb and full of cum!

David and his drag queen fella are in the throws of what seems to be a messy break up, he's spent the night with me a few nights ago, David that is, not the drag queen, you understand. I don't really like him very much, he's not a nice person. You know how on stage drag queens can sometimes be vicious and sarcastic to the point of pain, well he's like that even when he's off stage. Indeed, I've never heard him say a good word about anyone or anything, well apart from blue sequins that is. So I've played the dutiful agony uncle friend, the shoulder to cry on, the escape from the storm. And, I'm so proud of myself, not once did I say to David, 'I told you so' and rub his nose in the fact that I thought him and the drag queen were from the very start destined to the dumpster of relationships. Not once did those words escape from my lips, even though it was hard to keep them in at times, but hey, to be a friend, sometimes you just have to keep ya mouth shut.

I've had the occasional text or message from Angus, but no long conversations, no massive and monumental pub crawls, no nights of cinematic pleasure. Well, he's got his BLAGS, his diving and his fella the Robster, so I'm guessing things are still all happy and jolly over there in coupledom!

James, the Scottish one from the land of Scott is coming down next month, which will be nice and am sure he needs the break, the chance to experience again the ways of the south! I must give him a call this week to discuss the timetable, the scheduling of meetings and arrangements. I'm sure it will be fun and a vast amount of alcoholic beverages consumed.

Rach from work has been going through a funny spelt just of late, up and down, and between fellas, mind you that girl sure goes through them. I'm not saying she's a slut, no far from it, but she's never short of male attention. There was one that wanted to marry her after just one chance meeting on a train, soon after him another odd blokey with eyebrows so finely plucked he thought he was a Calvin Klein model, yet with looks to match a SmithKlein model, who'd not long come out of prison. Then there was the request from a local purveyor of weekend pharmaceuticals and now there's a chap who wants to take her to Milan for the football! And all that pretty much since December!

David, the other one, from work is much the same as always, dividing his time between here and visiting his poorly mother in Wales oh and of course going to the odd show. He's still good fun and a right old giggle, even though sometimes he does take a little too much lubrication and stumbles and almost falls off the stool in Dr Brighton's! Makes me smile, no matter how bad I'm feeling tho, it's great to have a friend like that!

Ny from work got a lovely Valentines pressie from her hubby, the Boobster, of a new laptop! So now she has welcomed the 21st century and the wonder that is the World Wide Web into her home. So all day long she can now delight in the occupation that is YouTubing!

Carolyn, or Carolyn and Jo has has a big birthday and is now part of the 'Over the Hill' club, don't worry honey, I'll be joining you there soon. I'm joking of course, after all they say life begins then, don't they? I didn't manage to get the night off at work, due to the 'evil one' being off sick or taking a half night or something, which really pissed me off. But, I'm sure a good time was had by all.

Julius has been back around for a bit of hide the sausage, which was nice, Nye was great, such a passionate boy between the sheets, or over the top of them and in the lounge as the case was. I did contemplate getting back with the little student, but we have so little common ground to start from and he's so completely mad that I doubt we'd make it to the two week anniversary stage, so whats the point? However, he does make a stunning fuck buddy, a right rampant little devil, which when you're single and suffering a bit of a drought does wonders for the ego.

Mo has still been dating the odd fella she's met through FaceParty which is good for her, she loves playing that game and all credit to her, she's a game girl for 50 something! We've been clubbing again, to Honey Club, to the Hard South night on the first Friday of the month, which is so hard and so banging it could cause a deaf mute to complain about the noise! I love it, and with a little drinkie inside you, it's easy to loose yourself within the music and the lights and dance ya tits off on the podium, which is exactly what Mo and I seem to do all the time.

Talking of Hard South at the Honey Club kinda brings me on to the next update, the story of Will! I was outside having a ciggie (Nope still not quite given up yet) when this rather handsome 23 year old got chatting to me, he was bright and funny and only a little bit under the influence. Anyway he took some pictures for his face book profile and swapped email addresses, as one does these days. It used to be land line numbers, then mobile numbers and now it's email addys or social networking site profile names. Anyway, I'm digressing, we swapped contact details and well the long and the short of it, is that he;s come down to Brighton to see me a couple of times. It's not any great relationship I fear, I mean, he;s 23, he's an apprentice and too be blindingly frank he's kinda in the closet. Well actually, scratch that, he's not kinda in the closet, he's so far in there he's hanging around with that 70's shirt that's never coming back into fashion. He's sweet, and funny, as well as being a bit of a 'lad' and he brought flowers for a late Valentines present, which to be honest was a bit unexpected. However I must say I was tremendously flattered, oh come on, how often in real life does a 23 year old buy flowers for someone who can no longer claim to be mid thirties? Not very often, so when he came to my door clasping a bunch of brightly coloured blooms, I was touched, OK so they came from the local supermarket, but at my age, I'd have been happy with a bag of potting compost, it's been that long since someone bought me flowers!

I guess that kinda brings you up to date with the life down here near the seafront, well as much as possible anyway without sitting here and writing till my fingers are just worn out numbs of blood and bone! That's all the major newsworthy bits to refresh you and help you slip back in to the daily dose that is the life of the Sex & The Seafront which are the Seafront Diaries!!!