Tears before the end.

Yesterday Matt suggested a trip to O'Fallon Mall, with dollar signs in my eyes, I agreed in a nano second, well come on, a self confessed shopaholic like myself, would kill a granny with our bare hands just to get a chance to shop at the mall or plenty. I know it's a fair old distance, at least by my small town UK standards, 110 miles to go shopping, but it was Matt's suggestion and he was the one who was gonna do the driving, so hey, what's a guy to do?

There is one bad thing about taking a road trip with my blond beloved and that is, no not his driving, which can be a little erratic at times, but his choice of music on the radio and the Cd's. It can be a bit, errrmm, well darn right odd at times, he likes to flick the stations rapidly, just like on the TV. An amazing gadgety thingy is that his radio in the sport red road monster is a satellite radio with a vast number of stations, too many to mention and far too many listen to during a two hour drive, but we tried. 40's, 50's 60's 70's 80's 90's and 20's had a micro rapid blast, so did alternative rock and BPM dance and ESPN sports radio but that was very rapid, plus there was a blast of BBC Radio 1FM !

Once we'd arrived we headed straight to Auntie Anne's for some much needed and much loved soft big pretzels, yummy upon yummy and thus sustained it was onward to shopping.

First there were two games stores for Matt, then it was the arcade so Matt could have a dance on the DDR machine. Then it was proper shopping, however to add an touch of panic Matt instigated a shopping/browse time limit of fifteen minutes per shop and when you know these shops are all my favorites, Abercrombie & Fitch, Hollister, American Eagle, GAP, Macys ! Never have I shopped so fast, didn't have time for Macys or GAP, but I still managed to walk away with two pairs of shorts and seven tops oh and a pair of flip-flops too!

I enjoyed the ride back, although Matt was snappy and cross, but I'm putting that down to the fact that he was out of bed before 11am on his day off! The return journey seemed to just fly by, taking a lot less time, have you ever noticed that? Coming back from some place seems to go more quickly? We only stopped long enough in the apartment for a quick pee and pick up the gifts that I bought for Matt's parents the day before. It took ages to choose, but I got them a arty pitcher and matching glasses and a funky vase, just to say a little thank you for their kindness and care and making me feel welcome. Also to thank them for the lovely gift they got me or a classic shirt from Hollister and some funky Levi pants, which are soo comfy I wanna wear them all the time.

It was great to see them, Betty and Steve, again, had a grill out and checked out the garden, which Americans call yard, which is very pretty, nicely elevated and gives a nice aspect to what really is quite a big house. I love spending time there, it's so relaxing, very pleasant. As always when we are there Matt disappears off for a while to have a root and toot in his old bedroom in his old belongings, books and games a plenty. I think Matt must have mentioned to his father that he didn't want to drive up to St Louis again, because not long before leaving Matt's father came up with a map and instructions in order to get a train to St Louis airport, from near the mall we'd been to that day. It was an interesting idea, Matt seems all for it, anything to get rid of me sooner, he's even suggested I go up a couple of days early! The cheeky bugger!

Soon, after home made cake and more homemade chocolate cheesecake, it was time to say farewell to Steve and Betty, Matt's folks, who spoil their baby boy rotten and who welcomed me in to their house many times. I promised to keep in touch, wished them well for the future and sincerely meant it. I have to say that my eyes were more than a little moist as we pulled out of their drive and headed away, I don't know when or if I'll meet them again and they've been so lovely, a lump in the throat I most definitely felt.

Matt's worked the lunch and then home for a couple of hours before going back in for the evening shift of till 7.30pm, but it's now 9.30pm and he's still not back ! He hasn't text me, but I'm not worried, he's often back late these days, he usually comes in about 11.30, saying he had to work late, I was worried the first couple of times, but now, well, I try not to be. If I mention anything to him, he says I'm being silly, he cares not that I might be thinking he's had an accident, laying bruised and battered in a ditch, been burnt by hot coffee, all sorts could have happened !

While he's been working I've not been lazy, I cleaned the apartment, done four loads of washing and done most of my packing, which has been rather hard, well I've got a fair few new shirts, new pants and stuff to fit in the case, which was pretty full on the way over, which seems a like last week, rather than the three months it nearly is. I might have to use a second bag, so it's kinda handy I left one with Matt last year, I'll sort that out tomorrow, which is another day, another day closer to the end of my yankee adventure, another day less on the remaining hours stateside. I have no idea when I'll be back, or even if I'd be welcome back. Matt seems very distant and non-committal about future plans, dreams and desires. Oh well, he's young, he's got all the time in the world, or at least that what it seems when your that age. When you come to my age, you suddenly realise that all time is an increasingly precious commodity, a commodity that rushes away from you at such a pace that it can astound and frighten.

Have you heard of Billy Mays? Well if you're English, chances are you haven't, he's a pitchman, he sells things, over here in America he's a household name, who passed away suddenly the day before yesterday. Think about over the top over enthusiastic salesman and you are on the right road, Billy Mays was a man with a unique voice and presentation style.