The lonely stranger in a foreign land….

The lonely stranger in a foreign land….

If you’re lonely before you come here, your loneliness will greatly increase once you are in this strange land where little is the same. There is an old expression, presented perfectly by Harry Chapin, “You can travel ten thousand miles and still stay where you are”.  I feel you can’t expect travel or relocation to ease all your woes,  solve all your problems, heal your broken heart or fill whatever void exists in your life. Your past is YOUR past, and will forever be so; it travels with you, despite any desire you may hold to leave it back where you left it. 

Once you learn or realise travel and relocation isn’t the panacea for all that’s wrong in your life, the better you’ll be. I don’t guarantee much, but I’ll guarantee that! Equally, if you’re lonely, Japan and especially Tokyo is probably not the place for you to spend too long in.  It is hard to explain, but for me, I feel like Tokyo is made up of 14 million individual people living 14 million individual lives! There is a certain independent expectation that exists here that I’ve not noticed in any other city. For example, if you go out to eat, the vast majority of restaurants and eating places just assume you are dining alone, and there is no drama and definitely no stigma if you are. Fresh ready meals from supermarkets or convenience stores are proportioned for either families or singles, and nothing in between.  

I’m not sure if Tokyo is an outlier or more typical of Japan as a whole, but the overwhelming majority of 20 to 29-year-olds are not married (79.4% of men and 65.3% of women). Around 35% of Japanese men in their 30s have no spouse or partner. The percentage drops by just 5% for guys in their 40s and only about 7% for those chaps in their 50s. Based on projections from the 2020 census, there are between 4.5 and 4.7 million singles in Tokyo today, and by 2030, that number could be up to between 5 and 5.2 million. 

So if you’re lonely at home, before you come to Japan, I think the chances of that loneliness following you here are, to say the very least, damn likely to be sure. But if you are like me, single and not necessarily lonely, you might just find this is an ideal city for you to visit. There is no faux concern when you eat alone in a restaurant, nor do you get approached by a woman, inviting you to join her and her family to eat, because they ‘felt sorry’ for you sitting all by your lonesome. Indeed, many restaurants have only ‘single person’ booths, stalls or tables. There isn’t an expectation for you to be in a couple, have a ‘significant other’ or be otherwise entangled. It’s refreshing, at least it is for me, to get a meal for one and not have accusatory or sympathetic eyes boring holes into the back of your head, nor do you get the quizzical questions about how come you’re single at such a mature age!

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Soothing Sunday and Saturday shopping.

Sunday greeted my eyes with the early morning sunlight filtering through the net curtains that hang at the floor-to-ceiling windows of my rented apartment. It was, according to a blurry grab of my mobile phone from the small bedside table, a little after 5:30. I’m not usually up at this time of the morning; however,  I’ve still not quite got used to being in a completely different time zone. It could be said that, for the first time ever in my life, the lag of jet travel was deeply affecting me.  I’ve been tired in the daytime and waking up late in the evening, just as the world says sleepy time should be upon you.

I yawned as I stumbled out of bed, opened the curtains before gravity had its pressing effect on the bladder of a fifty-plus-year-old, and I scurried as fast as my fat little legs could carry me to the bathroom. A few minutes later, I emerged, relieved and busied myself with making a cup of coffee while I tried to drive the pain in my right foot out of my mind. It is, apparently, quite common for sufferers of Plantar fasciitis to have difficulty in starting to walk, and for me, first thing in the morning is the worst. Well, that’s not quite true, it is equally bad after I’ve rested a wee while after doing a lot of walking and then getting up, and yesterday I did oodles and oodles of walking.

Twenty-three thousand, seven hundred and eighty-nine steps I had completed yesterday, Saturday, as I’d walked to the popular shopping area of Ginza for some retail therapy. That amount of steps, judging by my height and step length, is a wee bit over eight miles, and that, my little cherubs, is a bloody long way. Yes, I experienced some pain yesterday, plus there were a few moments when I had to stop and either sit down or just lean against a wall and lift my foot off the ground for a short while. However, let it stop me from heading to Chou Dori in the Chou Ward of Tokyo, it did not.

I’ve just paused to unload the washing machine and place clean garments on two clothes racks,  one now on the balcony, the other in the bathroom, under the clothes drying fan, such are the boons of modern life!

Yesterday, I was up at a similar time and after a leisurely shower and ablutions, I headed out on an ambling walk in the right direction of that enclave of shopping delectation. I should have waited,  I should have fixed myself a decent breakfast, for time was on my side. I didn’t know, nor did anyone warn me, that Tokyoites are not early risers and thus, it is unusual to retail establishments, other than those of grocery or convenience kind, to be open before 10:30 or more likely 11:00 on weekends. Therefore, I had almost an hour to kill before the stores opened, and money, I could spend.  Thus, little old Jason explored the local area, going up backstreets and down alleyways, savouring the sights and sounds and digging the general atmosphere of the place.

Of course, I now know I could have gone down to a store called Don Quijote, affectionately known as Donki, which opens its door at the shockingly early time of seven ante meridiem. But, I didn’t know that at the time, and to be honest, you really do need to mentally prepare yourself for a visit to the haven of bargains, narrow aisles and crushing tourists that is your average Donki. 

One of the more globally well-known Japanese clothing brands must surely be Uniqlo, yes, it’s from Japan and not some European nation like many believe! I do like the store, its clothes and the whole vibe of the place, but perhaps it is a little young for me. However, I do rather prefer its slightly cheaper and more encompassing subsidiary GU. For me, the conventionally stylish and unadorned by big brand branding, garments that GU offer are, right up my street, as it were. Thus, at just gone 12:30, I was emerging from the said flagship store with a large big brown paper bag containing a pair of shorts, a hoodie, two caps, two jersey-type shirts and six t-shirts. A smile upon my face, not least because I hadn’t packed t-shirts and needed lighter clothes more practical for the local climatic conditions, but also for the 10% tax reduction I received for being a visitor to this beautiful country. 

Oddly, the walk homeward seemed somewhat shorter, and I was rather pleased with myself for making it all the way to Ginza and back without needing Google Maps to aid direction. Although after I dropped off my GU goodies, I tootled round to the local supermarket for supplies, including bogrolls and bananas. Two crucial things for an international traveller, I’m sure you’ll agree, although I did get some more things, like bread, rice, and other such delights for dinner. 

I turned left and then left again out of my apartment building this Sunday morning and strolled like an old fart along the banks of the river. My leisurely ambling took me just down to Sumidagawa-Ohashi Bridge, which carried me across the river before I made my way back home on the opposite bank. It was rather peaceful, despite being a Mecca for joggers of all ages and courting couples from the younger generation, all making the most of the oasis of calm. At various points along the riverside, there are beds of either wild or cultivated flowers, which combine with sections of shrubs and bushes to add to the beauty of the waterway. If you ever come to Tokyo, I suggest you take a walk down this way, it's an ideal way to relax and enjoy a peaceful part of the city. 

I’ll have to go now, the wind is picking up and I’ll have to retrieve the washing from the balcony before it blows away and someone crossing the Shin-Ohashi Bridge gets a face full of my undercrackers!

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News or no news.....

It is Thursday 9th April, 2026 and I’m sitting down to type this after returning from a domestic shopping trip and a walk. A walk that has seen me, according to a pedometer step counting app downloaded on my smart phone, take 18369 steps, the approximate equivalent of 6.38 miles. Now, you may think that’s quite a mediocre amount, but let me tell you that for a fat fifty-six year old with a metal knee and Plantar fasciitis, is a blooming mammoth amount.

I’ve just drunk a mug of strong black coffee and opened up the Sky News website, but I can’t help but sigh despondently at the headlines:- ‘US and Israel have violated ceasefire, say Iran – as more than 250 killed in Lebanon strikes’  ‘Massive destruction in Lebanon’s capital’ ‘‘Democracy kills’- The self-styled revolutionary turning his back on the West’ and ‘Artemis crew face questions as mission enters final stretch’. Each story vies for attention on the first part of the screen, which in the days of newspapers, would have been termed ‘before the fold’.  I’m not sure which story to click on first, none of them sound like good news. There is a lack of anything nice or indeed remotely positive. I give up and make another mug of coffee!

It is a little after three in the afternoon, my feet, or rather, just my right foot – the one with Plantar thingamabob, aches, not surprising considering the walking I’ve completed today after leaving the apartment not long before eight-thirty this morning. I’ve closed the news down, I’m not in the mood to read more about death and destruction in Lebanon, nor have I the will to expose myself to latest craziness of Donald Trump’s and Benjamin Netanyahu’s ill-fated and absurdly injudicious war with Iran. The news is so depressing these days, that sometimes, I just need a little respite from the madness of it all and live in a blissful bubble of ignorance, at least for a while.  

The reason for my venturing out this morning was to buy myself an extension cord, a packet of bin-bags, dish cloths and possibly a plant. Hardly the most exciting of retail excursions, however, I’m pleased to say, mission accomplished, although the plant has metamorphised into an artificial mini Hydrangea Bush. Which, is perhaps a more sensible option, I’m not in the slightest green-fingers of folk and even I can’t kill something that’s made of polyester and polyethylene. 

I also nipped into a supermarket just round the corner before coming home to get something healthy for dinner. If you’re interested: salad, bread, rice cakes will be followed by pineapple, pear and grapefruit. Also sneaking into my basket were some mini chocolate filled buns and a small bar of white chocolate, so my desire to have a healthy day, has somewhat been tarnished by my complete lack of willpower to avoid sweet things and treats!

I’ve just paused to head out on the balcony to see where a loud and somewhat harmonious siren of a passing ambulance was coming from or heading to. Yet, despite is sonorous tones reaching me up on the seventh floor, I could not locate the said emergency vehicle or see where it was heading. Instead I busied myself with a brief look at a boat chugging up the never ceasing undulations of the river below. I do like the view, the river, the way the sunlight dances off the waves and wake like thousands of tiny mirrors. I always find rivers, just like the sea, to have a calming affect upon me. However, coming back to the keyboard, I fear you could take me to trading standards and complain about the title of this blog. Not the diary bit, but the seafront bit. You see, right now, I am not residing on the coast, nope, I am quite a few kilometres away from any particular seafront!  

Nine days ago I left my flat on the seafront just outside Hastings after more than a decade and headed somewhere completely different, although still with a view of rippling water. This time it isn’t the English Channel that greets my eyes each morning, but the darker river, called Sumida, that flows some sixteen or so miles from Iwabuchi to Tokyo Bay. Yes, you’re right, it isn’t in the UK, but, the archipelago of Japan and the major city of Tokyo to be more precise. 

I came to Japan for a six week holiday in November and December last year and really enjoyed myself, so much so that when my tenancy came to an end in St Leonard’s I thought little of boarding a passing Boeing 787-9 and flying more than thirteen hours to the land of the rising sun!

I’ve rented an apartment on the river for three months, which is the length of an initial tourist visa given upon arrival to British citizens. There is a possibility to extend the visa for another ninety days, making a total six month stay. I’ve already informed the lettings company that I do intend to extend my stay here as I sample ‘living’ in Japan rather than just ‘visiting’ it as a tourist. 

Right now I know little Japanese, except good morning, thank you very much and how to ask the way to the nearest train station or where the toilet is, but I’m sure I’ll pick up more the longer I stay here. However, right now, Google Lens app with its language translation function is a vital addition to my daily life in a land where the local language contains three different writing styles. Although, as anyone who has ever been here will tell you, a lot of products offered for sale in the numerous convenience stores also proclaim their contents in English. Equally, many of the street signs, trains, subways and buses are in both Japanese and English, thus ensuring even the most language limited visitor can get by.

I’ll show you around the apartment at another time, right now, my stomach is rumbling loudly, informing me it needs food, something it hasn’t had since breakfast around six-thirty this morning, and, for a fatty like me, is a long time ago! 

Copyright © 2026 Seafront Media

It’s been a while, hasn’t it?

Hello again, how the flippin’ ‘eck are you?

It’s been a while, hasn’t it?

I’m not even sure when the last time I was here putting words in some sort of order to resemble a sentence that would form vague coherent thoughts. Nor can I recall a time when you were here reading those very words!

I’m not sure where to begin, what to say, how to fill you in on all the intervening time, since last we communicated, if indeed, we ever did.  For all I know, this could be the very first time you’ve stumbled upon these very pages, that was once upon a time, called a blog.

So, if you are new around here,  I’m Jason, although most people call me Jay, I’m a man, now well into my fifties and I used to be a committed blogger.  [insert your own joke about how I should have been committed years ago] I would write various entries in this space, some about current affairs, some news, essays of my mind, gay lifestyle related stuff but mostly I was just documenting my life in all its glory or lack thereof. I’d let my fingers dance upon the keys on a weekly basis, although, it was quite often much more than weekly. I’d sometimes pour my heart out in this sphere of the internet for your delectation, desire or derision. There was very little that was ‘off limits’ I was as open as Dartmoor,  indeed, I used to have a little motto proudly proclaiming, ‘my life if an open book, it just needs you to turn the page!’ 

Then one day, I wasn’t there, or here, or ...well, you get my meaning.  I just stopped coming by so regularly, until one morning I just stopped blogging altogether. I sincerely wish I could recall the reason, or reasons why my mind could no longer drag up the enthusiasm to sit at a desk, in front of a keyboard and let letters spew forth into words. But, I can’t, not really, sure there are vague reminiscences of death threats, of boredom, of life changes, but the fog of forgetfulness is rather thick over those times. In my defence, the last proper bloggy type post here was more than a decade ago, so I hope I can be forgiven for not exactly being as sharp as a…..sharp thing as far as memory goes! 

Yes, it was back in October of 2013 that I was last here, properly, and that post was a groan about customer service from the local supermarket and how a complaint had resulted in a £10 voucher to say sorry. I’ve just reread that post and it was, is and forever will be a little on the dull side, but then again, life isn’t all rapid fire excitement!  That post, like all the others are still here, in an electronic archive of sorts. I could, if I so desired, click a few buttons and republished the lot. Once again, the inner workings of my mind, soul could be out in the open and that diary of my life in the form of 1286 blog posts be in the public domain. I’m not sure I want to do that, the oldest one seems to date back to October 2007 and I’m not sure how interesting something from that long ago really is in these current crazy times. 

Although, thinking about it,  my first blog wasn’t here, it was on a thing called ‘expage’ which was a web hosting platform from back in the day. I think it dates back to 1997 or thereabouts, but my expages are of the year 2000 vintage. Oh what fun it was back then, you didn’t need to know how to code to create simple designs and colourful pages. Yes, by today’s standards it looks more like Ceefax or Oracle than a website, but back in those days it was ‘funky’ at least I thought so!

Thanks to the WayBack Machine, that blog is still there, yes all archived, dusty and unedited. I read a tiny sample of it the other day and it made me cringe, it honestly did. But, hey, I’m sure if you were to look over the things you did in the year 2000, assuming of course you were around back then, you’d experience a similar sensation of embarrassment and shame. One day I suppose, I might just be brave enough to post a link to it, you never know!

When I originally decided to come back to the blogosphere, I was going to dedicate the first post to catching you up on what had occurred since I was last here. However, considering it was back in 2013 or so, that might be a bit of a tall order. No, not might, it certainly would be a mammoth undertaking to type all that stuff, so much so that my fingers would be worn down to blistered stubby knuckles and your eyes would be bloodshot and bleary [more than they are normally!] before you got even half way. So, lets just whizz through some headlines….. I changed jobs, I moved home, my mother died of cancer, my brother took his own life, my father died of cancer, I’ve had some bits cut out of my body, I’ve retired, I’ve put on weight, I’ve taken some of it off again, I’ve travelled and yet, after all this time, I still have a hankering for cheesecake!

Phew,  that was a long one! 918 words long to be exact, although, now that I’ve typed that, it is 932 words long, of which around 700 are superfluous to requirements!

Thank you for reading this far, if indeed you have, and, in the words of Chris Mason, you clearly ooze stamina.  I’ll be back soon with another post, to let you know where I am, what I’m doing and how I’m doing it.  It would be great if you’d come back and say hi, especially if you used to come and visit me in times passed.  I’d equally like it, if this is your first time here, if you popped up to say hello, if you’re so inclined.

Copyright © 2026 Seafront Media

Coming back soon.................

The old-style Seafront Diary is coming back.

After a lot of thought, a change in circumstances, the death of my father and lack of reasons not to, I'll be coming back with a new version of the blog.  It will take a while to get up and running again, and I'm not sure exactly how things will progress; however,  I do miss not being active in this sphere of the online world.  

Over the next few weeks,  I'll reinstate the archive, if it can stand the test of time. I'll also do a brief update on what has occurred in life since the last time I was here, so hopefully you'll enjoy that.

If you were here before, please do leave a comment and thank you for popping back.  If you're new around here, also please feel free to leave a comment and tell me what you'd like to see or learn.