Getting away with it?

My, my how times have changed! If you are someplace between 35 and 45 you'll remember a classic British kids TV show with George, Zippy, Geoffrey and Bungle - yep I'm talking about Rainbow! It was a classic, I loved it at as a kid, but, obviously I was a lot more innocent in those days, we;; weren't we all? I thought it was all innocent fun, but looking at it again these days, I'm not so sure. How did they get away with it back then.

Palin's effect? Burn after reading - why waste the match!

Some weeks there’s loads going on and other weeks there’s nothing going on, then of course there are those weeks where so much happens that it’s hard to draw breathe, take stock and contemplate your own position in this thing called life. Last week was one such week in the lives of Jason and Matt - i.e. me and him!


Firstly, my phone finally succumbed to the ravages of moist time following the curious incident of an introduction with soy sauce, which I’m sure you will appreciate is not a good thing for a phone, Chinese chef yes – mobile phone no. Thus, the phone fried and all numbers, photos and the life stored on the said phone have been lost. I still have the same number myself, but am sans numbers of friends, relations, contacts and also enemies - so if you are one of those then please text me your number so I can communicate with you all again – obviously enemies need not apply!

I’m still off the smoking, which is a surprise to me, but more surprising is the fact that last week it was more difficult to be smoke free than it was the first week I gave up. There is no reason for it, I’ve not done anything different, not been in smokers convention, not become a merchant banker, or done anything stressful, yet the craving for ciggies has been oh so much greater. I’ve bitten Matt’s head off a few times, without meaning to, without provocation, which I am immensely sorry for. There is a limit to on how many times I can blame my rapid mood swings on the lack of nicotine sloshing through my veins.


Matt’s father has been unwell last week, which stressed me out for mainly selfish reasons I have to confess, yes, I was concerned about my beloved’s papa, but I was also worried about finding the additional finances to pay for an unscheduled trip back home, should the need arise. Plus, I’d gotten used to Matt being here, looking after me and sharing my life, the idea of him going off without me filled me with dread – yes selfish I know!


I think I must be having the autumn blues really, I need the money, but I just don’t want to go to work for twelve hours a night for four nights out of eight, it’s so depressing, it really is, I feel like I’m back at school and facing double maths first thing on a Monday morning. When I wake up on my first day back, my heart sinks and colour drains away from my face, my feet become numb, my back aches and someplace, somewhere in the further darkest reaches of my psyche slams shut. OK, so that may be a little tad exaggerated, but it’s the sentiment is similar. When I get in that building, the place known as hell’s waiting room, I don’t feel all that bad, indeed it does have it’s enjoyable moments, yes they are few and far between, but it’s not all like pulling your thumb nails out with pliers, as I tend to make it out to be, so please don’t feel too sorry for me when I whiter on and on, all woe is me like. It’s just the winter blues, I’m sure, I’ll be back and jolly before you can shake a jack Russell by the tail five times.

Oh and we’re heading into winter, the weather is getting colder which means my sodding metal plate/screws/leg keep getting stiff and seizing up, which hacks me off, not because it hurts, it’s more uncomfortable than hurt, but it just makes me feel old and gives the odd embarrassing moment when I start to fall over. I swear people think I have a drinking problem when I go to stand up from my desk or a chair at 6am and promptly almost fall on my arse and have to grab the table to steady myself! I do wobble a bit as I start to walk, just before the stiffness eases, god I really sound like an old fart of over 60 don’t I? I’m not, I’m young, really I am, I just have to cope with the old war wound don’t ya know. Maybe I should book myself in for another check up regarding it, maybe the bone has worn down lower than the metal - the doc’s warned that could happen, which is causing the problems, or am I just making normal aches and pains more serious and dramatic, after all, we do like a nice drama don’t we? Us queens I mean! Shall I stop moaning now? I think I better had really, it’s not all doom, gloom, depression and recession!

On Wednesday night, Matt and I popped off to the cinema (does anyone call it the cinema any more? - Are we not to say the movies, or the megaplex or the cineworld?) We saw that film Burn After Reading starring Brad Pitt and George Clooney. It’s a comedy with too few laughs, Brad Pitt is miscast something terrible in it, he plays a gay gym instructor / personal trainer – perfect for a 20 year old, much less convincing for a 40 something, it just looked wrong. I also have to wonder what the heck is going on with George Clooney, I mean that fella used to be so attractive as Doug Ross in ER, he looks pretty dishy in many other movies he’s been in, but Burn After Reading he looks, thin, short and well ill to be honest, not the handsome hunk he used to be! The film on the whole was OK, but not the best I’ve seen, it has a few fun moments, like the thing Clooney builds in the basement, but I feel it never quite lived up to the foreboding heavy beat of the introduction music, which was thunderous and powerful.

How much do you usually spend on a new outfit? 20, 30, 60, 80, maybe 100 of those earth pounds or dollars, maybe a tad more if it's for a special occasion. Sarah Palin however spends just a little bit more than that, $150,000 more to be exact. Yeah, The Republican National Committee has reportedly spent about $150,000 (roughly £92,000 in real English money) on Alaska Governor Sarah Palin's wardrobe since she was chosen as John McCain's running mate less than two months ago. That's a lot of shoes, dresses, coats and romper suits! She spent $41,850 in St Louis alone, now I've been there and you have to go it some to spend that kinda money in the home of the Gateway Arch! She's even got the committee paying $91 for a romper suite with ears for baby Palin. How she's got the cheek to ask for that is pretty amazing, it's not like the babe in arms has anything to do with the campaign, with getting elected, with being political at all, but that what she's got.. All this at a time when we're heading for a global recession, which apparently is starting to bite strongly in downtown USA. Matt think's she's toast, I'm not so sure about that, I guess time will tell. And who the hell calls their baby Trig anyway?

I guess time will also tell for the career prospects of the road painter in Leeds after bosses spotted his latest bit of handiwork. I wonder if he painted it before of after lunch - I'm guessing after!!

Whilst in Pemberton (also up north) a naked man was found in a supermarket chimney on Wednesday, Police believe he was a robber, but fire fighters had to come and rescue him, no one is sure why he was naked tho, perhaps he wanted to make a clean get-a-way!

Little Britain star Matt Lucas has dissolved his civil partnership to Kevin McGee at London's family court. In an uncontested case, Lucas was granted a dissolution on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour by his partner TV researcher McGee, there we have it another gay divorcee, which sounds like a great title for a book me thinks, Oh wait a moment, it is, it's by Paul Burston, and it will be out soon!

The World in a Tea Cup!

Can ya believe it's Sunday already? It seems like only yesterday it was Saturday! Anyway, what a week it's been, what a week indeed. At the start of this weekend we had what's being described as another Black Friday, apparently, The Global Credit Crunch has really started to bite, the world markets are in freefall, global stocks fell in the worst day of trading for 30 years. Pretty much all the major markets closed well down parking fears that the world is about to tipping in to recession.

The pound fell to a 5 year low against the dollar, which could be bad news for me and the proposed move to the States. Iceland’s prime minister has had to go on telly to say that his country is not bankrupt, which isn’t convincing, every hour there seems to be a news story breaking about various different British companies, councils, authorities with loads of funds invested with banks in Iceland. By my last count, some £294 million quid from 11 different councils could be in danger, which seems a lot if you ask me, well it seems a lot even if you don’t ask me.

I have no idea really about all this doom and gloom regarding all the global credit crisis and the downturn in the worlds economy, it hasn’t really affected me yet and I’m not sure it will at all in the short term. OK, so bread is a little bit more expensive than it was some months ago and cooking oil’s gone up, but other than that, everything seems pretty much the same. I guess that could all change, I could be plunged into a fit of dispair in the not too distant future, my money and my savings could be wiped out, but then again, I could get struck on the head by a bolt of lightening walking along the prom with my pod playing tunes from the Weather Girls and wearing a pair of blue slingbacks! Mind you, one of my friends went out the other day for a bag of tomatoes and came back with a sofa, credit crunch hasn't hit Brighton yet then!

So it may all be gloom and doom in the financial world, but in other worlds it’s more happier, indeed one could say it heelarious! I know that’s spelt wrongly, but stick with me for a moment here, Two mums in the States have created high-heeled shoes, nothing strange in that I hear you cry, but it is bloody strange when you learn that these high-heeled shoes are for newly born babies. They're called Heelarious (not you get it!) and come in six different styles - including hot pink, black and white stripes and leopard print. Do babies really need high heel shoes? Is there really any point to it?

I had a message the other day on FaceBook from DB, a friend I haven't seen for a while, times were that we'd spend hours on the phone to each other, usually slating the current pop trends, evil camp queens of talking boys and sex. Now, as we both have boyfriends, out communication has evolved in to messages on social interaction site Facebook! He was telling me that his boyfriend, knows a bloke who did the hair of the bloke that the former Mr Gay UK ate! Did you see that story, a chef and former Mr Gay UK, because confused about his sexuality, had a row with a mate and killed him, then cut up bits of him and fried them up with some fresh herbs! Nice, wonder what wine he had with it, perhaps a nice Chianti?

Talking of Facebook, the social interaction site is pissing me off big time, ok the new layout takes a bit of getting used to, but the thing that really pisses me off about it is the fact that it was created and run by a geeky 24 year old, Mark Zuckerberg, who dropped out of Harvard to work on the site and is worth nearly a billion dollars! Oh and girls he's single, OK, so he might not be the best looking guy in the world, but it's not like he's an ugly munter, plus he's got a billion other reasons to like him!!

Is it all done for the bulldog in lipstick? She abused her power a report has found, so could this be the end of Palin? The Republican vice-presidential candidate was accused of sacking a senior state official, Walter Monegan, in connection with a family feud. Yep it's true, Mrs Palin was accused of dismissing Mr Monegan for refusing to sack a state trooper who was in a bitter custody battle with her sister. The report concluded a family grudge was not the sole reason for the dismissal, but was a likely key contributing factor. However, the report said that the actual sacking of Mr Monegan was not beyond Mrs Palin's legal powers. So basically we know that she'll abuse her power in favour of her own family, she'll then lie about and get those around her to lie about it, she'll promise to testify and then break that promise, sounds like she'll fit in perfectly in The White House!

I don't usually go political on this blog, but sometimes it's just a little hard not too. Seriously, she sounds great for the top job, well come on McCain ain't no spring chicken, so I don't expect him to be king of The White House for very long, which would mean, Palin would be in charge. Palin is a lifetime member of the National Rifle Association, she believes in the right to bear arms, including handguns, including youths. She supports capital punishment, In a 2006 debate, she said she would support teaching creationism in public schools. Oh an not only does Palin opposes same sex marriage, while she was the Governor of Alaska, she wanted to deny state health benefits to same-sex couples, so in other words she isn't keen on gay or gay rights. Palin has stated that abortion should be banned in nearly all cases, including rape and incest. Palin has promoted oil and natural gas resource exploration in Alaska, including in wildlife parks and refuges.

Even with Palin/McCain in the top job, well I can't seem to get my head round Americans voting a black into the White House, I'm still so positive about my possible move stateside in a few months, at least I was until I realised that I'll probably miss the opening of a new fantastic musical that's due to open in London in March next year. I'm even toying with the idea of flying back over to London town to see a show that has over 200 hats, 100 wigs, 150 shoes and around 500 costumes in each performance!

I am of course referring to Priscilla Queen Of The Desert, the Musical which comes to the west end on March 10th 2009 and is set to rock London's theatre land just like it did back in 2006 when it first opened in Sydney. So far down under it's grossed over $90 million and been enjoyed by over a million Australians and is the most successful aussie musical of all time! Jason Donovan leads the cast treading the boards at The Palace Theatre, playing Tick, the role made famous by the talented Hugo Weaving in the 1994 film. It's looking like a darn fine night out if you ask me, but then again, I'm gay so what would you expect?I loved the film, which remains in my most watched pile, it's just a lovely, camp feel good movie which is great to put on whenever you feel down or the world turns a dark grey colour. A bit of bright and sparkle and champion Witt from the three drag queens heading to the red, or do I mean dead centre of Australia really lift the spirits and brighten the mood, so I'm looking forward to seeing the musical show, my only hope is that it lives up to it's predecessors reputation! "Just what this country needs, another in a frock on a rock"

Is it just me or is anyone else fed right up to the back teeth of the tears from the X factor final 12? They all seem to have a sob story of some sort or another, some more valid than others and they all seem to let rip with the waterworks as soon as a camera has been turned on! I'm sick of it, really I am, I'm sure they all are only doing it to get the sympathy of us the voting public, but it's not working, at least not with me, I'm cheesed off with the whole 'tears before bedtime' routine - enough already!

And that's enough from me too!

I was talking with Jason the other day about how American things seem so distant and unrelated to myself since my stay in the UK, and I decided that I would write now how the differences are, and where I see myself today. I think that this whole idea thats been caught up in my mind for the past few days started when we were watching Sex and the City and Jason was making me tell him what they were eating and what brands certain things were and the quality of them. Brand names and memories flooded from the underworld dreams of my mind, and things that I haven't seen in a long, long time started to become oh so familiar again.

It's funny how when you can have anything in the world you can never decide what you want, and if you really even want anything at all, but the second that it all becomes disconnected you want everything you could have every had, and long for the strawberry taste of it. I'm talking about twizzlers, a strawberry licorice type of candy that you can really only get in America. Carrie and the gang were on her bed enjoying a nice big bag of them, and Jason asked what they were and I told him. From that point on I longed for the artifical flavour of them, thier almost plastic texture, and the smell of the air when you first open the bag.

Other things soon emerged that I noticed as well. Act Two popcorn, Bubble Yum, Root Beer, Mountain Dew Baha Blast, and Shaved Ice. Is this all I miss though? Just food items and some random drinks? Do I even really miss them at all? I don't think so. I think it's just the familiarity of them always being there and the habit of just having them. I can honestly say that I can live without them all, although it's nice to have a few of those things every now and then. So what else has changed, and what else do I miss? Nothing really. I am still that American Boy that I was when I first came here, although I have developed a small accent and picked up a few british words (My Favorite being Bollocks hehe).

Sometimes I wish I had certain things with me, but mainly when Jason is at work. I wish I had some of my CD's that I left behind, or rather wish that I would have loaded it all up on my computer when I left. I also miss my books that I have from my collection, as I had recently developed a hunger that only a good book can fill. I'm open to suggestions at this point, as I have read House of Leaves over three times now, great book, but not great enough to read again.

In other news, It seems Sarah Palin has screwed up big time. I guess this is what happens when you abuse your power though, and if she abused her power as a govenor, then what the hell is she going to do as the big VP? I told Jason that she looked like a badass kindergarten teacher in the picture as shown above, and we had a good giggle about that.

Nothing else is new really. It's the same ol great Brighton, with great views. All I can really say is that I am home now with Jason, and I am loving it.

To revisit or not to revisit

Some things are better left un revisited! During this recent four off, Matt and I danced ourselves dizzy at The Honey Club on Friday night with Mo for about of Hard South. The music started off well, showed a lot of promise, we danced on the raised stage in front of the DJ booth for a whole two hours. But its early promise didn’t come to fruition; indeed it sped up and then slowed down and then sped up but wasn’t as hard as it has been on previous occasions.

One of the positive things about giving up smoking was that I no longer needed to vacate the main dance room for the wilds of the outside area in the vicious sea side wind. Matt danced like a wild thing and there were a few times when I feared for the safety, or rather the eyeballs of other clubbers that just happened to get close to those flailing arms!

Mo was in complete agreement of the poor quality musical entertainment factor and thus we adjourned to pastures new, which happened to be Legends. It was the first time Mo had ventured into the gay world of Legends and was confused by transvestites, drag queens and which were which, but had a good time regardless, before homeward bound she travelled in a vehicle of the taxi variety.


We say Mo again on Saturday for one of her legendary cheesey vegetable bakes which proved enjoyable and as filling as always. She recounted her travels around all the retail outlets in search of Italian Herb OXO stock cubes, how she called the customer careline on the back of a packet and found that this product was only now being carried by Sainsbury’s and how she had to bike it over there to purchase 26 boxes! That should see her through a little while I
mused. We say Lance who looked, A) Clean B) Sober D) On this planet C) Normal D) happy. He’s got himself a girlfriend, which seems to have done the trick, at least for now, plus he’s off this week on an activities week or something of that description.

Sunday after a nice Sunday morning stroll around the village, Kemp Town village that is, it was back home to read the papers and relax, like normal people do at the weekend, which is something of a novelty for me. That evening Matt decided he was going to treat me to a night at the moving picture palace down at the marina.

I mentioned here some time ago that I wanted to see the new movie version of that classic early 80’s TV show Brideshead Revisited, so that’s what my lover-boy took me to see. I have seen some reviews, which were, shall we say not so complimentary or positive, but I tend to make my own mind up and so went in with an open mind. There was 8 other people in the auditorium when we took our seats which halved before the film was 15 minutes old. I suppose that may tell you something, or it may tell you nothing depending on what side of the fence you sit.

I remember the 1981 TV series with much fondness, it was my first taste of costume drama, my 12 year old mind was captivated and oh so enchanted by the romance of the period, the beauty of the setting and the charm of the story telling, Antony Andrews and Jeremy Irons were my childhood friends, oh and not forgetting Aloysius. Perhaps Brideshead was my first taste of homosexuality, albeit Platonic, on the small screen, I can’t remember, perhaps it was
because I was allowed up late to watch it by my mother, perhaps it made me feel as if I were not alone in this world, whatever it was, I loved it. More surprisingly, for a 12 year old, watching the TV series even inspired me to read the Evelyn Waugh novel.


So what can I say about this, the new, or the revisited version of Brideshead Revisted on the big screen at your local cineplex? Well, it's got great costumes, it's got a nice cast, it uses the same wonderful castle as the origional Granada production - the vast and beautiful Castle Howard. I enjoyed the film, but Sebastian is played with more campness than a row of tents, Charles Ryder is as dry as the Sahara and it's far to short, yet far to long at the same time. I suppose I'm being a little harsh, you can't get over 11 hours of telly into 2 hours of film, therefore it's not surprising that some things were left out. It's a great slice of life in an England of long ago, it's pretty on the eyes, scenic is perhaps the word that springs to mind as the film travels between Oxford and Brideshead. I loved Emma Thompson's performance as Lady Marchmain, powerful without stealing the scene. If you've not seen the series it's a good film, if you have, then it doesn't, perhaps can't match up, for me the series has the upper hand, perhaps there are just some things that should not be revisited! However, I'd still say go and see it, it's probably the best 3 star film you'll see in years!

The last four off that we had were a blast. It was my first taste of clubbing, and I have to say that I had a great time. I don't think that I quiet danced as crazy as Jason said, but who knows, I was caught up in the moment of it all. I really had an absolutely wonderful time. The music was really good, but quiet different than what I am used to hearing. It's a big change from alternative rock to electronica. Afterwards at Legends we had a great time with Mo. She made me laugh numerous times with questions about trannies and drag queens and the first thing that popped in my mind was "I'm just a sweet transvestite". I told Jason that we are going to have to have a movie night with her sometime to see the Rocky Horror Picture Show, and Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. The next day I took Jason to see Brideshead Revisited, because I knew that he loved the Telly series to pieces, and because I thought that the film looked interesting. All of the reviews seemed to determine otherwise though, as nearly all of them gave it a measly two stars out of five. Complaints seemed to be about how it was much to short, and just seemed boring. I personally really enjoyed the film a lot. Having had no previous experience with Brideshead, it was a whole new story to me, and I missed out on none of the things that weren't touched from the series. I guess what the problem really was, is that once a series is released and is great, it is expected that something that spawns off of that series, I.E. a movie or second season should be just as good, if not better. Needless to say, I would have given the movie at least three stars, if not four. The rest of the days off we had were spent cuddling with Jason and just being a lazy bum. I made him some authentic Mexican Quesadillas with Quorn chicken, fresh tomato's and cheese. I think he liked them by the way that he hungrily ate all of his.

So that's it for now, till the next time I have loan of your eyes and ears, I thank you from the bottom of my bottom and wish you well. Oh and keep coming back for more, I need all the readers I can get!

10 days!

Active, keep active, think cash not ash, think of the money, think of ya health, think of the future, keep active, do things, save the money, don't listen to others, don't put yaself in stressful situations, all that an more is good advice that comes flooding at you from all directions when you try and give up the smokes. From leaflets, from the NRT patches, from friends, from loved ones, from the old geezer down the road, each single one great but each single one incredibly hard. But hey, I'm starting to bitch, I loved my morning fag, you know the one that's somewhere located between breakfast and shower, I loved my 'desert' smoke, the one just after a meal, as satisfying as a big dollop of cheesecake, I loved my pre-work ciggy, the one just before you get to the office and ready yourself for a day, or in my case, a night, in the frightening real world or work. I loved my post work inhalation of chems, that soothes you into the freedom and takes away the stresses of the said day/night. Oh and what about the 'after glow' chuffing puffing? Oh how I loved that ciggy, oh god I really did love that one - but it's all gone now, all that pleasure has been consigned to the waste bin of life, I've been off the little white sticks of pleasure death for 10 days now! Yeah, amazing though it is, I have managed to go 10 days without the crutch that's been with me since school days. OK, so I haven't gone it alone, I've had the help of the NRT patch and the NRT gum and the NRT Matt, but even so, I feel I've done well, at least for the time being. However, I'm not gonna lie, I'm not going to tell you I feel a whole lot better, that my life is more rounded now that I've successfully been 10 days without reaching for a Marlboro Red! Nope, I feel no different, I don't feel healthy, I don't feel like a new man, I haven't noticed more money in my pocket, I haven't noticed my senses of taste and smell coming back, in short, I feel exactly the same as I did 11 days ago! The only difference is that Matt seems to want to snog more, apparently it's no longer like snogging an ashtray, which I guess ain't exactly pleasant, so I guess for some it does have it's up sides. For me however, I'm yet to see any major benefits, but maybe like drunken sex, they will come in time!

Award Winning!

There are times when you just have to pat yourself on the back some some achievement or other, and this week is one such occasion. This blog - The Sea Front Diaries has won the Proud Out Loud website of the week on Vancouver.net!

I love Vancouver, been there a couple of times and loved every second of my visits there. Hopefully Matt and I will be able to hop on a passing 757 sometime next year and spend a little vacation in that fascinating city. It is, without a doubt a wonderful city, so much going on, so much to see and do, plus it's got some of the friendliest people you'll find anywhere on this planet, so I am of course delighted to have won their website of the week award. So, Thanks very much guys!

Cash not ash & Fat boys by the sea!

Brighton has been bathed in really warm weather, clear powder blue skies, gentle and restful seas with the waves just kissing the shoreline like a feather. It's late September and I really should be back at school, Oh wait, this is blog not an old Rod Stewart number! Nope, it's been really lovely down here on the South Coast over the last couple of days, which I've just loved sharing with my wonderful lover, Matt, who I must same has been a tower of strength and support. He's also got the patience of a saint, or perhaps a dozen saints if the truth be told - I've finally decided to kick the habit I've held for about 29 years! It's been a long time coming, a very long time coming, but three days ago I smoked my last cigarette - hopefully!


My first ciggy I can clearly remember was nabbed from my mothers packet when she wasn't looking and smoked coughing and spluttering in the 'top shed' at home, I was the tender age of just 11! I didn't take to smoking straight after that, nope, the sick and green feeling that followed my first puff put me off for a long while, but my mother didn't notice for a long while that those little cancer sticks kept disappearing from her numerous pack about the house. I wasn't having them, but I soon realized having then soon increased not only my popularity but all so my pocket money at school with the older kids. I know it was bad, naughty, shameful, but I was young, had NHS glasses, hand-me-down clothes and forced to carry a brief case to school, so in those days I needed all the help I could get!


Since then I've pretty much been a constant smoker, well save for a few instances of forced abstinence - hospitalisation and the like, but it's been there through all the good times and the bad, it's been round the world with me and stayed at home. It's been on the beach, in the bar, down the street, in the bed, it's never answered me back and always given me contentment. So what I'm basically saying is smoking has been a good friend to me, OK, I'm no fool, it's a good friend that can kill, it's a good friend that leaves a stink and a mess, it's a friend that is becoming more and more a social pariah, but a friend it has been none-the-less. It's hard to give up friends, it really is and even now I'm still not so sure that I can conclude this friendship, but, I have a lot of reasons to, not least of all Matt. So there I was on Friday, no more cigarettes, all my duty free purchases have, literally gone up in smoke and I wasn't going to buy any more.


Matt and I had decided a couple of days ago to go to East Croydon, to the Central Shopping Mall to be exact. Nope there wasn't some special sale on that we just had to get to, and no it wasn't a book signing by a top author or whatever - besides, Paul Burston's new novel 'The Gay Divorcee' isn't out yet. Nope there was another important reasons we were heading on up to the London suburbs, I'm not sure I should admit to this, but hey what the heck, in for a penny, in for a pound! The real reason Matt and I were going north was that Croydon just happens to be the closest place they have an Auntie Anne's! Auntie Anne's, is for those that don't know a pretzel place, and I kinda fell in love with this doughy snack while I as over there in the summer. So, we hopped on a bus and got a bus/rail ticket for half the price of just a rail ticket (go figure!) and headed to a place I've not been to for years and years.


The first shop we went in to was a music and DVD store, where Matt indulged my Carrie fascination and purchased a copy of the limited special extended edition of Sex & The City - The Movie DVD! I was as happy as a pig in shit, as they say, although my stomach was crying out for substance as breakfast has been forgone in the pretzel prospect whilst the rest of my body cried, no screamed out for nicotine!


Pretzels in Croydon are exactly the same as they are on O'Fallon, St Louis and thank the lord of fast food above for that! I loved it, Oh OK, I loved all three that I forced down my gullet! I felt stuffed, so very stuffed, but was so happy and rather satisfied, at least food wise. I still ached to have my usual fix of nicotine and the other 400 odd substances you find in cigarettes. I'd not told Matt at this stage that I was going to give up smoking and I'm not sure he'd even noticed that I'd not had once since the evening before, but my nerves was jangling wildly and I'm sure I was being an arrogant little short tempered jerk. So the very next retail outlet we visited was Boots, where I stocked up on patches and gum, of the NRT kind. NRT is, nicotine replacement therapy, I never knew that but I could instantly feel myself begin to calm down as I chewed like a cow on my first bit of nicotine gum!


Matt was very pleased at my selection and even paid for the stuff, which, was very kind and supportive, which he's been since that moment, which is one of the major reasons why I haven't yet weakened my resolve to be a reformed smoker! I went home a happy person, I had My Sex & The City DVD, I'd had my fill of Auntie Anne's Pretzels and I'd got nicotine running around my system without the inhalation of smoke!


Saturday was a lovely morning, I found it difficult to know what to do with my hands, but the gum and the patch seemed to be doing the trick. It's going to be a hard habit to break, I keep putting my fingers up to my mouth, as if smoking an invisible cigarette, I keep sniffing my fingers to try and locate the smell that lingers, but it's not there. After breakfast, I wanted what used to be a very satisfying smoke, but of course it wasn't there, so I reached for a Pixy Stix instead!


We then headed over to the straight hell that is West Street, a street that no poof ventures except once a month on Wild Fruit night, but this was not night and this was not a Sunday, it was a Saturday and it was day time. The only reason we were going straight was to meet up with Mo, her lovely fella Ben, her daughter and granddaughter and her son in Yates for a liquid lunch. We arranged to meet them, to meet Ben in the flesh for the first time (I'd spoken to Ben on webcam before a few times previously) They were all off to The Big Beach Boutique 4, the Fat Boy Slim concert on the beach that was being held that afternoon. Matt and I had tried to see where earlier in the day, but the whole upper prom and beach had been fenced off, so there was no chance of getting a view without paying for a ticket, and I'd sold my single ticket to Lance the day before.


It was great seeing Mo and her son Richard and meeting Ben and not to mention Antoinette! her granddaughter and her fella - who looked about 12, but is in fact 18! It was nice to have a giggle and a chill, then we went to the beach in the blazing sun. Richard and his bald headed friend Casey (with the cute eyes) had a paddle in the sea while the rest of us looked on and laughed. We enjoyed a drink in the sunshine and it was indeed like a warm summers day. Brighton was packed, very packed indeed, an invasion of people overtook the seafront and the surrounding streets, and I couldn't believe it wasn't the middle of August. After a few photos and giggles we left Mo, Ben and company to the massed throng of the Fat Boy watchers, headed up the pier, which was the pretty much the only place you could see the stage from for free. However, from that distance the stage looked like a shoebox and we soon gave up and headed home for some nourishment.

It was an hour or so later that we ventured out again, the sun was still high and warm as it seemed was the mass of people in the 'paid' area of Marine Parade for the concert, we stayed looked over the railings (the few that weren't fenced off) for a little while, at least until I started to feel old. There was a young Policeman that went passed below our vantage point that didn't even look old enough to be wearing long trousers and out on his own, which made me feel as old as Brighton itself, yet Matt smiled his smile, laughed and told me I wasn't 'that' old and I chewed some more 'special' gum and headed across the road to Legends.

A couple or three later we wobbled our way home and cuddled and smooched on the sofa and watched a RomCom on DVD. A wave of happiness swept through me like a rush of wind through the leaves of a oak tree in in a summer forest. Not only had I had social drinkies without having the usual multitude of fags, I also had the loving arms of the most wonderful man I've ever met around me. Life is good at the moment, I'm still not smoking, still chewing the gum and wearing the patch and ya never know, I may just manage to not quit quitting!

I have to say that I was amazed when Jason took me into the boots store as he told you earlier and started to pick up nicotine replacement therapy. I literally went into shock, because I knew that he was going to quit sooner or later for both of our own good, but not this soon. It's either because I nagged him so much about it, or because he really cares about mine, and his welfare for our future together, I know it's the second choice. Smoking is the leading cause of preventable death. Period. And although I might have been a little bit too naggy sometimes for my own good, I am not about to lose the love of my life to a rolled up radioactive stick that's almost always portrayed to be safe when they aren't. Having lost a Grandfather to cancer caused by smoking, and having a father that has severe emphysema because of smoking, I think I had a valid reason to start bugging him to quit. I can't describe how happy I am for Jason's decision to give up, and know that I will always be there to support him. I know that he can get through this, with my support, and his willpower. The past weekend that he has been off has been amazing. We have just been in a good mood the entire time pretty much, and have just been overall even more comfortable together than before, which seemed impossible to me, as we were really really comfortable together to begin with. It's not like the honeymoon period has ended or anything, but perhaps evolved in a certain sense. It's an indescribable feeling really, but what would best describe it all would pure and unrefined happiness. If I am near him, I know that I will be happy no matter what.

It was great to see Mo and everyone on Saturday, and to go out to a pub and have a pint or so. I finally found my drink after much searching and dismay at certain points, and it's Strongbow. The only beef I have with it is that it leaves a bitter taste in your mouth after drinking it, but hey, it's not all that bad. I look forward to the next time when we all go out together, or the next time that Jason and I go out. I think tomorrow we plan to go to the beach for a little bit, and to pick up a power converter for me somewhere maybe, that is, if we manage to get out of bed.


Keep coming back for more - please, I need all the readers I can get! Oh and tell ya friends. Till the next time, take care.