(2026 Edit - This post was one of the earliest ones found in the archive, dated 14 November 2007, published at 14:01. I was living and working in the seaside city of Brighton, on the East Sussex coast. Images from this post have inadvertently been deleted.)
Do you ever see the news and wonder what the hell is going on with the world? I often do, and today is no exception, for example, catching my eye today from the newspaper and the 24-hour news channels is the very odd story of an Indian farmer who has married his dog! Yes, honestly, it's true, this guy has actually married a dog after a long search for a 'suitable bride'. Selvakumar managed to get a four-year-old mongrel bitch from a friend and had a fully-fledged Hindu wedding in front of villagers and elders on Sunday. Eyewitnesses said the canine bride, named Selvi, was adorned in a sari and flowers and brought to the temple by village women. A Hindu priest conducted the ceremony.
I know we're all supposed to be going green and recycling, but if the latest trend in China starts to happen over here, I'm not joining in! Apparently, over there, used condoms are being recycled into hair bands in parts of southern China! A bag of ten of the recycled bands sells for just 25 fen, which is about 2p, much cheaper than others on the market, accounting for their popularity! Used second hand condoms in your hair sounds pretty revolting to me, but it's happening over in China. However, in one of their local papers, a government official was quoted as saying recycling condoms was illegal.
An ancient law banning an English town from holding a market because it is less than "a donkey ride" away from one in a rival town was branded an ass on Tuesday. Yet the centuries-old law is used by residents of South Shields near Newcastle to prevent their neighbours in North Shields -- just on the other side of the Tyne river -- from setting up a market is still being used. "We have been trying for a number of years to get around this," said Maggie Richardson of the North Shields Chamber of Trade and Commerce, which wants to set up a weekly market. "But every time we have approached South Tyneside Council, they say they were given a market charter some time in the 1200s by King John, so that no one can set up a market within a day's donkey ride.
Other very odd laws of 'Ole England' that still exist, according to a dodgy UK TV channel, include the following:- It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament.
It is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British King or Queen's image upside-down.
Eating mince pies on Christmas Day is banned.
A pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants.
It is illegal not to tell the tax man anything you do not want him to know, but legal not to tell him information you do not mind him knowing.
It is illegal to enter the Houses of Parliament wearing a suit of armour. All false, except the last one, as armour has been forbidden since 1313.
My school days were never as interesting as they are for the kids today in Nottingham. Nope, a young schoolboy was given a very unexpected surprise for his 16th birthday when a stripper turned up in the middle of his drama class. The stripper - dressed as a policewoman - had been booked by the boy's mother, who had apparently asked for a "gorilla" to mark her son's big day. The woman even asked the teenager's teacher at Nottingham's Arnold Hill School & Technology College to film the event so the family could see his reaction. On arriving halfway through the lesson, the stripper walked up to the unnamed boy and made him crawl around the class on all fours like a dog. Then, to a Britney Spears track, she spanked him 16 times - once for each year - before stripping down to her bra and knickers. It was only when she asked the schoolboy to rub cream on her booty that the shocked teacher called a halt to the show! The mother is claiming a booking error for the incident, but surely the school shouldn't have allowed this. I mean, is this the kind of lesson we want our kids to learn?
Edit - I've just been emailed this bit of news from a reader!! A man nicked in Glasgow for having sex with a bike!!!
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